Hi, meet me again. Well I’m not in mood now. Currently, I’m listening to
Nightingale – Demi Lovato.
This time, I want to tell you about something that
probably will I hate, and also I won’t forget it. My young life. Yes, it’s my
school life.
I’m in high school now. It’s SMAN 3 Bandung. Such an old school. It’s
located on Jl. Belitung No. 8, right beside SMAN 5 Bandung. They just separated
by a corridor. The first thing landed on my mind when the first time I came
here is, ‘can I survive?’. Confused? Yes, me too.
I didn’t even know why I thought that. I never knew where that statement
came from. I didn’t even know what does that mean. Until a day, yes, a day.
The first week, filled with a lot of activities. One of them is called
‘MOPD’ or, you can say, ‘MOS’. I thought, that would be a very exhausting time,
by looking at my other junior high friends who also got a hard time while doing
it. They had to do what they didn’t want to. Their upperclassmen got angry with
them. I understood that’s a way to bring and make them into a good persons who
can face harder things in the future.
Nakamatachi-About my
friends, they’re kind enough. I’m telling the truth. I’m a very quiet type
person in my class. A very very very quiet one. I don’t talk much. Maybe they
think I will talk just when needed. I’d rather stay and draw in the class or go
to the mosque and stay a little longer there than go downstairs and look for
food with my friends. Well, I wasn’t too close with my classmates. I always
wanted to enjoy laughing with them, I wanted to join them, I wanted to be a
part of them, but I didn’t know, somehow, I just can’t. But now, I have some
friends, who care enough for me.
The lessons here, you can say, they’re very hard. Very. Some teacher
even gave us homework without explaining them before, or they explained them
very fast. I took this with a cold head. ‘This is how university will be.
They’re harder than this.’. Then I followed them seriously, but still I didn’t get
them. I got frustrated first and even more frustrated when I came home.
Nakushita
shimatta-I’m feeling so exhausted. ‘I can’t stand this anymore’. Everytime I got
home, I would always cry on my mother’s lap, causing me to have a very tired
and swollen eyes the next morning-thank God I could always hide it under my
glasses so no one would know-. I told her whatever happened that day. What did
the teacher taught in the class. What I feel when I was in the class. What things
that I can’t carry on my shoulder, what happened between my friends-I always
and will always keep an eye on them-, and many things I wanted to share with
her.
Naze?-Soon,
negative thinking came to my mind. I’ve never felt this way before. What can I
do there? I’m nothing more than a nothing there. I even thought, what’s the
reason why I am alive. I felt so down. I asked my mother to transfer to another
school, but then she talked to me to wait and stay.
Hashiridashita-I run. Yes,
the only thing I did is just run away, never be brave to face them. Always feel
down on my mind. Negative thinking and feeling alone. I was blind. I was too
afraid. I was.
Everytime I tell her my stories, she would just listen and pay her full
attention to me. Then she gave me some advices and what I have to do next time
if I face them again. I would argue with them, saying that I’m stupid or
anything, and she told me, there’s a sky
above the sky. She knew what I was feeling. I said that I’m no match for them,
I can’t survive in my class. But then she shut me up.
She said,”Somehow you will, for sure.”
That’s only a sentence. A sentence that changes everything.
Now, I’ve been close to the others in my class. I learned to face them. I
learned to be brave when I fail. I learned to be a strong girl. And also I learned
to accept what happened. I’ve learned a lot.
I’ve changed my impression towards my school. They don’t mean to make
you feel tired or exhausted. They don’t mean to give you a lot of tasks so that
you can’t have enough time to play. No, they don’t mean that all. They teach
you how to be a strong human to be able to be success in the future. They teach
you that life’s hard, and you have to work hard and give all you have to reach
what you want to reach. Anything has its
own reason. Never judge a book only
from its cover.
Because everything
isn’t as bad as it seems.
